I truly believe that knowledge is power.
We begin our scholastic journeys together at a young age. As they spoon feed us material from the given curriculum, we soak up the possibilities of our futures among peers.. dreaming of what lies ahead.
The knowledge we are provided with varies very little, offering power for the masses, and little opportunities for educational and preferential expression. As we grow and blossom in our educational careers, we are provided with more options, adding forks and exits to what has been up to this point, a pretty straight and narrow path. Through Jr. High and High School we pick and choose our schedules and what classes we'll most likely skip weekly.. and then we get to college. Areas of literal expertise are ours for the choosing. Blank road maps that will lead anywhere we are willing to imagine. At this collegiate level, our horizon broadens and we, if we choose to listen, learn about ourselves in entirely new ways.
At this age, we are expected to sit down and decide who and what matters to us, and what exactly we are willing to do and sacrifice in order to get it.
No pressure right? Oh no worries... they've provided us with every kind of class you can imagine to help us figure it out! I mean, when in the middle of an emotional, spiritual, physical, or intellectual crisis, who doesn't think "man i'm glad i took that synchronized swimming 101 class" or "WWSD.. what would shakespeare do?!".
I am so grateful for opportunities to learn and for classes that allow you to follow dreams and make possibilities realities... but what then? Where are our classes on stress.. love.. fear...heartbreak.. the 15 uses of nutella.. decision making..? What text book do we turn to with equations of the heart and soul? WIth questions of identity and purpose?
We learn all of these things.. and then don't know what to do with them. You're a doctor... you spend like half your life in medical school.. you graduate... get a great job... your life is planned out for you.... the end? You study to become an accountant.. political dictator.. seasoned writer... public relations guru.. rock star... and then what? Your life becomes puppies and rainbows? No. Logic makes sense. It can be measured and taught. Formulas and equations can be taught.. strategies learned.. It all makes sense once you understand it.
If we truly believe.. which i do.. that the things that matter the most in life are people.. not things... relationships.. not reason.. then why do we fail to educate the masses on the things that will make us the happiest?
If only... if only..they offered love 101... decision making 305... fulfilling your potential 900.. secrets of the universe 112... creating a purposeful identity 760.. we would be prepared to face LIFE not just OCCUPATION.
The text books of love that we're fed along with our logic, are the fairy tales that give us what? "and they lived happily ever after..".. alright homies... prove it.
Where are the movies that show you what happens after they fall in love and have the big kiss? The only thing we're taught about love.. is that it's full of sparkles and fireworks.. and when you KNOW.. you just KNOW.
Does that sound logical to anyone? no. And because we're taught to believe this.... we only look for sparkly relationships in where we get rainbows and puppies.. and disregard the ones that bring any form of discomfort or fear. We immediately jump to conclusions that something is wrong with THIS relationship because we're too scared or stubborn to move anywhere with it.. and hey now... cinderella was never SECOND GUESSING HERSELF when she was dancing on glass and off marrying prince charming!! They just sparkled and shined right down the isle.. and on into... "ever after... happily.."..obviously.
The reality of love... is that everyone is afraid of it. No one will admit that they were terrified or unwilling to change to make things work.. they claim that they followed the model of sparkly butterflies that led them straight to their prince.
Let's throw those love text books out the window and write our own. One's full of logic and reason that both our mind and hearts understand.
The best place to start... is with ourselves.
Kindergarten: Customizing relationships.
I was a part of a very interesting discussion tonight. 2 guys and 2 girls, not looking to date any one of the other (at least as far as i know) sat down and talked about relationships. Our individual needs, wants, expectations, and past experiences. I was genuinely surprised at how different we were.
The interesting part came when we started talking about what we were looking for, and what we felt people should see in us.
Stop what you're doing right now. Imagine that you have the opportunity to tell someone exactly how to love you. Not necessarily explaining your perfect companion.. but you are to explain to someone else how to make you fall in love with them.. and how exactly you want to be loved back.
I wanted someone to value my independence, who was able to be their own person, and be secure enough be alone with themselves in a room and not feel uncomfortable.
One of the guys wanted someone that would always be with them and want to be with them, not necessarily having to carry on conversation or even touching... but to be physically around them all the time.
The other girl wanted a guy that was in her face all the time that she would never ever get sick of.
The other guy wanted someone to want him.. but didn't necessarily need to be with her all the time, like he wanted her to need to.
Figure yourSELF out, what you want, what you need, what you're willing to compromise.. find out how to love YOU.. and then don't be afraid to communicate that.
This first lesson needs to be that every person you meet is so incredibly different from anyone you've ever known.. and as far as i know... nobody reads minds. You may find yourself ruling out relationships that could be wonderful based on the fact that you expected something out of it, that you didn't communicate.
You have the ability to love and be loved exactly how you want to be. So figure it out.. take yourself on a date and get to know YOU. if you don't know you... you're gonna confuse EVVERRRYYONE else trying to get to know the undecided opinion-less bafoon that you look at in the mirror. This isn't just for single people, anyone in or out of a relationship should take the time to get to know the person they actually are, as opposed to the person they assume they've always been. Customize your love like you customize your personality. Make it one of a kind, and perfect for the people in the relationship.
1st Grade: Some times things happen.
Honestly, after all these years, i still believe in everything happens for a reason. However, my understanding of the phrase has changed.
I believe that understanding, and providing understanding, is the key to every relationship in your life. If you can try to provide the logic and emotion behind decisions you've made or are making in a relationship... WHY you over reacted.. WHY you don't want to continue dating someone.. how you came to the conclusions that you did... you may even talk yourself out of your own stupidity and see that you didn't make sense.. and you need to change something.
Understanding is all i can ever ask for.
However.
The new understanding that i've come to understand..... is that sometimes.... things happen.. and you're left guessing. Sometimes people don't provide logical explanations for what they do and how they act. Sometimes.... you don't understand.
And in these cases.. before you get frustrated.. and start building walls and digging holes in your heart.. try to learn to let things go. accept that maybe you'll never understand... but that all is well that ends well.... and you have just been provided an opportunity to rewrite your own happy ending.
I'm not saying you have to celebrate when something doesn't work out that you wanted to... i'm not sadistic.. or retarded... I"m just saying that rather than search for unattainable understanding of the unfathomable... let it go.. and dive in to something.. or someone else.
don't let it forever affect your ability to form lasting.. trusting relationships. You'll be fine. I promise.
2nd Grade: A little give.. a little take.
Please consider in love.. that everyone needs to talk.... and everyone needs to listen. Generally.. people are better at one.. and worse and the other. If you're a giver... work on being able to accept someone else doing something for you... if you're a taker... work on the ability to give someone more of yourself than you take from them.
If you are good at talking.. don't talk. Listen.
If you're good at listening.. don't just listen.. express your thoughts and feelings.
Stretching yourself in a relationship.. will only make you more invested in what you have with that person. It will allow you to balance yourself out in someone else.. and help teach you to need someone else.
As much as i could go on up into the high school years... and help all of us graduate with the heart of another.... it's like 3 am.
We all don't need lessons on how to make someone fall in love with us.... or how to make ourselves fall in love with someone else... there are plenty of past blogs for that.
The hard part is getting it to go both ways. and there are no books for that.
If we can constantly strive to be the best kind of person we can imagine ourselves to ever be... our love lives will never fail us. If we love the way that we want to be loved... and surround ourselves with people we actually want to be with.. as opposed to people we think we should be with.. one day.. we'll have happily ever after.
Look first at the faults in yourself before accusing someone else of being the problem in your relationships.. and never compromise who you are for who you think someone else wants you to be.
There's making things work... and making things worse. And giving up yourself in the process of looking for someone else.. is retarded.
Feel free to add your own chapters to our love/life book! There are many grades to go in our school of life and love.
Until Later..
xoxo
-Callymon
May 7, 2012
April 17, 2012
Discovery Channel..
Who invented this torturous week that makes all college students contemplate suicide?
Happy Finals week.. and may the odds be ever in your favor..
Where's the trust?! We went to your class all semester (except that mental health week we needed when it was like 70 degrees in the middle of January).. we took all your pointless quizzes.. can't you just assume we learned oh so much from you? you REALLY have to test us on things you know for a fact we're going to attempt to cram into our brains the week before... regurgitate just for your hour of death test.. and forget for the rest of forever? These are supposed to be our glory days! And you know once we get senioritis in high school we never grow out of it...
As finals continue to kill me... i'll continue to take these breaks between study sessions that are longer than they should be..
I will warn you.. this post will not solve world hunger.. or your relationship problems.. however, it will provide you with a temporary break from thinking all together..
This is the discovery channel of pointlessness...
6 things i discovered this semester..
1. Red give me movies or give me death Box
Yaa sure i knew that redbox existed and what the whole idea of it was. I'm not retarded.. i don't live under a rock. But it's one of those things that until you try it... you have NO IDEA the impact that it will have on your life of procrastination. EPIC. I highly suggest that you go and explore.
2. Clarisonic face washing brush buzz thing of amazingness Mia
Happy Finals week.. and may the odds be ever in your favor..
Where's the trust?! We went to your class all semester (except that mental health week we needed when it was like 70 degrees in the middle of January).. we took all your pointless quizzes.. can't you just assume we learned oh so much from you? you REALLY have to test us on things you know for a fact we're going to attempt to cram into our brains the week before... regurgitate just for your hour of death test.. and forget for the rest of forever? These are supposed to be our glory days! And you know once we get senioritis in high school we never grow out of it...
As finals continue to kill me... i'll continue to take these breaks between study sessions that are longer than they should be..
I will warn you.. this post will not solve world hunger.. or your relationship problems.. however, it will provide you with a temporary break from thinking all together..
This is the discovery channel of pointlessness...
6 things i discovered this semester..
1. Red give me movies or give me death Box
2. Clarisonic face washing brush buzz thing of amazingness Mia
If you're wondering if it'll change your life... TRUST ME. it'll change your life. It A) feels awesome.
B.) clears up all the yucky stuff on your skin.. and C) comes in adorable colors.. mine is purple, like this one.. It's worth every cent.
It looks nothing short of disgusting.. but it's amazing! My mama has a crew of milfs that all work their little buns off together.. they've handed their health destiny over to my cousin.. whom i like to call "the milf whisperer" she got them all HOOKED on this stuff.. so naturally.. callymon tried it. It's amazing. seriously. yay for health and not dying. woo!
It charges your phone.. when you're not by a plug. uh.. duh. and doubles as a defibrillator and jet pack.. not really. but i love it. especially because i'm convinced that apple is making their batteries die sooner and sooner in a plot to take over the spot as the monopoly phone company.. oh wait.
5. The dance dare..
Ellen.. one of my favorite humans ever... challenges all of the people that come on her show.. as well as eager fame hungry audience members.. to a double dog dance dare.. it's a fantastic way to spend a saturday.. or monday.. and like all of the other discoveries.. you wont know until you try.. and then you'll be addicted and go around dancing behind everyone.. looking ridiculous.. and having so much fun.
6. The JATD app...
If you enjoy quirky humor and like to laugh.. and your twitter doesn't refresh as fast as you may like when you're in classes that you cant stand... get JATD!! Just a Typical Day will fill your life with puppies and rainbows.
6. The JATD app...
If you enjoy quirky humor and like to laugh.. and your twitter doesn't refresh as fast as you may like when you're in classes that you cant stand... get JATD!! Just a Typical Day will fill your life with puppies and rainbows.
4 things i've learned this semester...
1. Completely clear contacts SUCK. you can't see them when they fall out.. or get lost in your eyes. In the last week i've almost completely accepted the fact that i'll most likely go blind from the contact LOST somewhere in my freakin eye!! and then i got it out.
2. Cell phones have airplane mode... when you dont want to talk to anyone... but still want to play bejeweled blitz on your cellular... flip it to airplane mode. Just don't forget to switch it back.. or your parents.. room mates.. and friends may sent out search parties.
3. There's finally a "hide all engagement announcements" button on facebook!!!.. nope sorry. we can dream though right?
4. You have to be happy single or you wont be happy in a relationship. It sounds cliche but it's true. Learn to be happy where ever you are in your life and marital status... if you're always happy no matter the circumstance, guess what...! you'll be happy... it's basically rocket science.
5 sad songs i've written this semester:
1. Anything..
2. Shadow Man...
3. Unlovable..
4. Don't make me love you again
5. Whole
Dang.. i write bloody sad songs.. if you need a gateway into depression.. hey.. i'll provide the soundtrack.. its fine.
5 movies i'll definitely see this summer... (and reasons why)
1. The Avengers...
reasons? have you seen Chris Hemsworth? yep.
2. Madagascar 3.
.. because of the polka-dot afro zebra. obviously
3. Snow White and the Huntsman..
uh... Chris Hemsworth again. duh.
4. Rock of Ages..
Cuz it looks awesome.
5. Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer.. no.. not really. that looks retarded.
5. The Dark Knight Rises.
Cuz it looks so incredibly Bad A.
3 reasons this will be the Summer of Love...
1. bearlake is so much better when you have a homie to tube.. boat.. lay out.. and nap with.
2. the world may end in december.. it may be the last summer we have.
3. and i need happy songs dang it!
5 boys that i've decided i will date in my lifetime/ have been dating in my head for quite sometime now..
1. Zac Efron.
we have HISTORY.. duh. can't fight a hsm love like ours.
2. Hunter Parish..
uh.. we have history.. when he sang on my album when i was 11 there was a definite connection that we both can't deny..
3. Chase Crawford..
uuh.. he's perfect. annd he went to high school with one of my friends. so. obviously that means we have to get married.
4. Ryan Reynolds
He's perfect looking annnnd... he's hilarious.
5. Ryan Gosling
He a) stars in the best movie of all time... b) was in the mickey mouse club.. and c) looks incredible in a tailored suit with a little bit of scruff. yuuum.
4 things i hate...
1. Rude people. There's no reason to be mean. be nice.. retards.
2. Dark Chocolate.. why would they make chocolate.. that's bitter? so counter productive.
3. Gossiping. It's stupid. worry about your own dang lives.
4. finals.
2 things i want to do but probably will never be brave enough to..
1. Skydiving. the idea of it is incredible.. but no. i'm not going to jump out of a perfectly good airplane that's NOT going down.
2. Dye my hair this color..
the second i decide to go back blonde.. i'd probably end up bald.
7 things i'll never understand...
1. Where all the lost bobbie pins go.. you can buy a million.. and in 3 days.. you can't find ONE!
2. Why Nsync ever broke up.. i hated saying bye bye bye to boybands.. but now that they're comin back.. it makes me ill.
3. how facebook is legal... its a way to literally stalk every person you know.. and dont know.. without being arrested. Thank you ztalkerberg.. we love you.
4. how people pretend to hate Justin Bieber... he's adorable. he's talented. he's a bazillionare.. he wears purple. and he's like 12! what's the problem? and now he raps! bonus..
5. how they haven't invented a sarcastic font yet... if texting and emailing and facebooking really is the dark and dismal future of communication we're all headed for.. we at LEAST want to be understood!
6. Stingy red mango workers... you wont get paid any less if you actually fill my $10 cup of yogurt up.. why the heck do you get joy out of short changing me on my glutton free amazingness? fill-er-up!
7. Crocs.
1 song i've written that will most likely never make the album....
I wrote it with my friend BC for an Adam Sandler movie and they never used it... yes.. its called "Horizontal Hula"... #myybad
Happy Finals week. You're welcome for helping you procrastinate whatever you were supposed to be doing.
Until Later..
xoxo
-Callymon
5 movies i'll definitely see this summer... (and reasons why)
1. The Avengers...
reasons? have you seen Chris Hemsworth? yep.
2. Madagascar 3.
.. because of the polka-dot afro zebra. obviously
3. Snow White and the Huntsman..
uh... Chris Hemsworth again. duh.
4. Rock of Ages..
Cuz it looks awesome.
5. Abraham Lincoln Vampire Slayer.. no.. not really. that looks retarded.
5. The Dark Knight Rises.
Cuz it looks so incredibly Bad A.
3 reasons this will be the Summer of Love...
1. bearlake is so much better when you have a homie to tube.. boat.. lay out.. and nap with.
2. the world may end in december.. it may be the last summer we have.
3. and i need happy songs dang it!
5 boys that i've decided i will date in my lifetime/ have been dating in my head for quite sometime now..
1. Zac Efron.
we have HISTORY.. duh. can't fight a hsm love like ours.
2. Hunter Parish..
uh.. we have history.. when he sang on my album when i was 11 there was a definite connection that we both can't deny..
3. Chase Crawford..
uuh.. he's perfect. annd he went to high school with one of my friends. so. obviously that means we have to get married.
4. Ryan Reynolds
5. Ryan Gosling
4 things i hate...
1. Rude people. There's no reason to be mean. be nice.. retards.
2. Dark Chocolate.. why would they make chocolate.. that's bitter? so counter productive.
3. Gossiping. It's stupid. worry about your own dang lives.
4. finals.
2 things i want to do but probably will never be brave enough to..
1. Skydiving. the idea of it is incredible.. but no. i'm not going to jump out of a perfectly good airplane that's NOT going down.
2. Dye my hair this color..
7 things i'll never understand...
1. Where all the lost bobbie pins go.. you can buy a million.. and in 3 days.. you can't find ONE!
2. Why Nsync ever broke up.. i hated saying bye bye bye to boybands.. but now that they're comin back.. it makes me ill.
3. how facebook is legal... its a way to literally stalk every person you know.. and dont know.. without being arrested. Thank you ztalkerberg.. we love you.
4. how people pretend to hate Justin Bieber... he's adorable. he's talented. he's a bazillionare.. he wears purple. and he's like 12! what's the problem? and now he raps! bonus..
5. how they haven't invented a sarcastic font yet... if texting and emailing and facebooking really is the dark and dismal future of communication we're all headed for.. we at LEAST want to be understood!
6. Stingy red mango workers... you wont get paid any less if you actually fill my $10 cup of yogurt up.. why the heck do you get joy out of short changing me on my glutton free amazingness? fill-er-up!
7. Crocs.
1 song i've written that will most likely never make the album....
I wrote it with my friend BC for an Adam Sandler movie and they never used it... yes.. its called "Horizontal Hula"... #myybad
Happy Finals week. You're welcome for helping you procrastinate whatever you were supposed to be doing.
Until Later..
xoxo
-Callymon
March 21, 2012
The Hunger Games..
We live in a world that scarcely resembles the one that existed not too long ago.
Technology has been in a constant incline along with our conveniences, girls wear pants now, music has become.. for lack of a better word.. retarded (dubstep? really?), and the universe of hopeless romantics and true love has been annihilated and replaced with a battle field.
This phrase has been used before - that love is a battle field. But, the lovely 80's songs that claimed they knew anything of heartbreak and tragedy, couldn't have foreseen, or imagined in their wildest nightmares the catastrophe that is this 21st century; Our "modernized fairytale".
As it's been ground into our minds time and time again that the ship is going down, and world ending as we know it, every single adult from the ages of 18-31 has been forced to enter into an appalling competition. You see, every eligible individual in the said age bracket is forced to fight to the death- or til they get married, which ever comes first- against every other warrior in search of the same thing... love.
All is fair in love and war right?... there are no rules.
The main objective and purpose is to find a compatible companion, suffer as little as possible, and get the heck out of the fight. Once you find the said individual that you choose to exit the games with- you are promised a life time of fairy dust, and rainbows, that we like to call marriage... (Although... every contestant, or tribute, to exit the games is sworn to secrecy and forced to say it's all peaches and creme anyway - so... you kinda just hope for the best.)
In order to extinguish the hope of the surviving tributes faced to fight this fight, many obstacles are placed in the "arena" of the single dating world. When face to face with these obstacles all can seem virtually hopeless, but if all the tributes can just keep their head above water.. they hopefully can prevail. Although the obstacles are generally created to challenge the specific tribute's weaknesses, a few remain universal. Facebook, for instance, with it's never ending newsfeed of people that you thought were more pathetic than you, that would CERTAINLY never get out of the games before you..... that are getting engaged right and left... before you. The people that aren't afraid of pulling out the big guns.. that no longer have to watch their backs and think of combat strategy. HUGE obstacle. HUGE annoyance. Huge mind trap manufactured to drain our common sense and decent thoughts about humanity in general... also put there to bring out insecurities you didn't know existed. Woo!
Regardless.. champs.. keep your heads up... and let the 2012th hunger games BEGIN!
Now... as i anxiously await the movie premiere of the ACTUAL hunger games... you bet your bottom dollar i'm going at midnight.. I'm going to let the characters who have gone before us... fought the good fight... and come out victorious.. be our mentors in our own hunger games. Hopefully with smart training, and learning from the mistakes and lessons of iconic tributes, we will be able to give ourselves the best possible chance of surviving.. and winning!!
Let's start with my favorite: Peeta.
Peeta's outlook on life, is that no matter what you're faced with... fear.. doubt.. success.. money.... that you should remain the same person. That you should always maintain your core values, personality, and admirable characteristics. It doesn't matter the situation... or relationship you're in....the things.. or people.. that are placed in your life. Be you. Forever.
So. the first thing we need to do, to train up to be like Peeta.. to gain this weapon and be able to use it to our advantage.. is figure out WHO exactly that is. Who are you?.. What do you stand for?..
Once you figure out who you are in the very depth of your being.. then make a vow to yourself to never compromise it. Don't let yourself settle for being less than you really are, just because someone demands less of you.. or attempts to drag you down.
I know too many people that when fighting in these games, abandon everything they've ever learned about friendship. Girls.. and guys... that go at each other's throats in an attempt to land the same person. Homies.. there's more than enough people to go around. You don't need to sacrifice every friendship that you have in your attempt to connive and sneak your way into the heart of the one you feel is within your grasp.. or next on your radar. You badmouthing someone else in an attempt to somehow get ahead in this game... doesn't make THEM look stupid... it makes YOU look stupid. And anyone worth being with would see this as a weakness.. not a strength.
We are the average of the 5 people we are around the most... so the people we associate ourselves with.. and relationships we choose to have.. will help dictate how our character is formed and maintained. Choose to be around people and in relationships that make you more of the BEST you... that wont tolerate you being anything less than exceptional. And strive to be the person that others would want to be around for the same reason.
The other anti-peetites.. are the sad sad cases of tributes that lose themselves completely in an attempt to please someone else.. Those unfortunate souls that enter the games as one person... and exit as someone completely different, abandoning anything that remotely resembles the old them.. leaving an empty shell of a person.. sure to collapse under any sort of pressure or conflict.
One of my best friends, Mark, had just started dating this girl, Kaitlin, when all of his sparkles faded.. all of his charismatic fire went out. He slowly faded into her shadow, adopted her meanness, and within a few months.. also became completely unrecognizable. Yes. He got out of the games... as someone totally different than the person he came in as. He abandoned his friends, tact, friendly demeanor. and is forever lost in a sea with no lifesaver. A guy that would do anything for anyone even if he didn't even know them.. became someone that was self centered that thrived in the demise of the happiness around him.
As i continue to reveal my true inner nerd...
When it comes to maintaining your true identity... combine your Peeta mentality.. with that of the sword of Griffindor from Harry Potter.
While we all should remain ourselves... every single one of us could do with some refining.. so.. only take in that which makes you stronger and better as a person.. disregard the things that would destroy your light and goodness. Avoid the retarded people out there that suck. Cuz being with them.... will make you suck too.
The second mentor from the games that we're going to train with is Katniss..
Katniss is admirable for her strength and independence. Plus she's a total Bad A. However.. we're going to avoid repeating things that - although could definitely further us in a fight of hand to hand combat.. shooting people and stuff... - when it comes to this LOVE hunger games.. will only hurt us.
While i'm probably the biggest fan of tough independent women there is.. I'm gonna start by saying STOP.
When it comes to getting out of THIS hunger games.... loading yourself up with armor and building a fortress around yourself and your heart.. will only leave you.. alone. which completely goes against the point of this whole war. So hey.. dummies... I know we all want to suffer the least amount possible.. however.. never letting people in.. will get you absolutely nowhere.
Don't be afraid to feel.. to be vulnerable.. and open to the idea that someone can actually pick you up when you fall. You don't have to just lie there until you heal.
Everyone is afraid of losing the upper hand by actually CARING about the other person in the relationship. I know this is unconventional... and in the eyes of all the tributes fighting, probably a pretty scary survival technique... but if everyone could make a 180 with their thinking... and worry about being the person that cares MORE in their potential relationships.. we might actually have some functional relationships here!
Yes.. this exposes you to potential gunfire... however.. if you put yourself out there.. and get shot.. then at least you can heal and move on.. rather than live in fear of getting hurt! Honesty never hurt anyone in the long run. so.
At least be open to the idea of love. You'll never go anywhere if all you do is shut out potential ways to be happy. You with your big bad weapons of mass destruction.. will only end up in a big bad world.. all tough.. and by yourself.
The final tribute that we're going to take notes from and train with.. is Gale.
Now without getting into a big Team Peeta or Team Gale war.. even though im team peeta cause he's perfect.. whatever.. we're going to learn from the BIG FAT MISTAKE of Gale.. and hopefully come out more victorious than he did.
Gale.. is basically the male version of Katniss..
Everyone feels all sad for gale because they feel like he loved Katniss first and blah blah blah...
Even if you haven't read the books... all you need to know is that yes, apparently Gale loved Katniss for like 5 years.. and he didn't do a dang thing about it. Not ONE. So.. it's nobody's fault but his own when she gets swept off her feet by Peeta.
The lesson we're going to learn here...? FIGHT for the ones you love! When you feel something... SAY SOMETHING!! The worst thing that can happen.. is you get shot......... you heal..and you move on.
Gale had Katniss all to himself for so long and all he did was be her friend.. the strong silent type that.. uh.. ends up by himself.
You have nothing to lose and absolutely everything to gain by going after something you want. So do it!
I'm not trying to rag on you here guys... but this is your JOB. DO YOUR JOB!! Take love by the horns and make some magic happen!! make a move. Ask girls out. The amount of money spent and the extravagance level of the date has absolutely NOTHING to do with anything. You don't have to spend ANY money.. but it is your job to pull out your big guns.. and make some plans. Control that destiny.
I'll tell you right now that there isn't a girl out there that wouldn't love to be swept off her feet.. so get a broom.
Take the first steps. Don't be stuck at home... watching the one that got away be with someone else cuz you were too chicken to say something or do something. Go make some magic happen..
As the world is ending as we know it.. let's all keep in mind that we wont be stuck in this huge sucky battle forever... And once we get out of this war... there lies a whole new set of challenges and rewards. The only thing we have complete control of.. is ourselves. Let's make sure that we are in the best shape possible -fundamentally.. emotionally.. physically.. intellectually.. and characteristically..- with the greatest weapons we can find in order to fight the good fight and come out victorious. Let's become warriors of love.. determined to fill the world with more of it... not determined to beat the system and somehow end up room mates with the closest thing we could find to real love. Do everything you can to be a winner.. Go get fighting. Let the 2012th Love Hunger Games begin...
Until later..
xoxox
-Callymon
Technology has been in a constant incline along with our conveniences, girls wear pants now, music has become.. for lack of a better word.. retarded (dubstep? really?), and the universe of hopeless romantics and true love has been annihilated and replaced with a battle field.
This phrase has been used before - that love is a battle field. But, the lovely 80's songs that claimed they knew anything of heartbreak and tragedy, couldn't have foreseen, or imagined in their wildest nightmares the catastrophe that is this 21st century; Our "modernized fairytale".
As it's been ground into our minds time and time again that the ship is going down, and world ending as we know it, every single adult from the ages of 18-31 has been forced to enter into an appalling competition. You see, every eligible individual in the said age bracket is forced to fight to the death- or til they get married, which ever comes first- against every other warrior in search of the same thing... love.
All is fair in love and war right?... there are no rules.
The main objective and purpose is to find a compatible companion, suffer as little as possible, and get the heck out of the fight. Once you find the said individual that you choose to exit the games with- you are promised a life time of fairy dust, and rainbows, that we like to call marriage... (Although... every contestant, or tribute, to exit the games is sworn to secrecy and forced to say it's all peaches and creme anyway - so... you kinda just hope for the best.)
In order to extinguish the hope of the surviving tributes faced to fight this fight, many obstacles are placed in the "arena" of the single dating world. When face to face with these obstacles all can seem virtually hopeless, but if all the tributes can just keep their head above water.. they hopefully can prevail. Although the obstacles are generally created to challenge the specific tribute's weaknesses, a few remain universal. Facebook, for instance, with it's never ending newsfeed of people that you thought were more pathetic than you, that would CERTAINLY never get out of the games before you..... that are getting engaged right and left... before you. The people that aren't afraid of pulling out the big guns.. that no longer have to watch their backs and think of combat strategy. HUGE obstacle. HUGE annoyance. Huge mind trap manufactured to drain our common sense and decent thoughts about humanity in general... also put there to bring out insecurities you didn't know existed. Woo!Regardless.. champs.. keep your heads up... and let the 2012th hunger games BEGIN!
Now... as i anxiously await the movie premiere of the ACTUAL hunger games... you bet your bottom dollar i'm going at midnight.. I'm going to let the characters who have gone before us... fought the good fight... and come out victorious.. be our mentors in our own hunger games. Hopefully with smart training, and learning from the mistakes and lessons of iconic tributes, we will be able to give ourselves the best possible chance of surviving.. and winning!!
Let's start with my favorite: Peeta.
Peeta's outlook on life, is that no matter what you're faced with... fear.. doubt.. success.. money.... that you should remain the same person. That you should always maintain your core values, personality, and admirable characteristics. It doesn't matter the situation... or relationship you're in....the things.. or people.. that are placed in your life. Be you. Forever.
So. the first thing we need to do, to train up to be like Peeta.. to gain this weapon and be able to use it to our advantage.. is figure out WHO exactly that is. Who are you?.. What do you stand for?..
Once you figure out who you are in the very depth of your being.. then make a vow to yourself to never compromise it. Don't let yourself settle for being less than you really are, just because someone demands less of you.. or attempts to drag you down.
I know too many people that when fighting in these games, abandon everything they've ever learned about friendship. Girls.. and guys... that go at each other's throats in an attempt to land the same person. Homies.. there's more than enough people to go around. You don't need to sacrifice every friendship that you have in your attempt to connive and sneak your way into the heart of the one you feel is within your grasp.. or next on your radar. You badmouthing someone else in an attempt to somehow get ahead in this game... doesn't make THEM look stupid... it makes YOU look stupid. And anyone worth being with would see this as a weakness.. not a strength.
We are the average of the 5 people we are around the most... so the people we associate ourselves with.. and relationships we choose to have.. will help dictate how our character is formed and maintained. Choose to be around people and in relationships that make you more of the BEST you... that wont tolerate you being anything less than exceptional. And strive to be the person that others would want to be around for the same reason.
The other anti-peetites.. are the sad sad cases of tributes that lose themselves completely in an attempt to please someone else.. Those unfortunate souls that enter the games as one person... and exit as someone completely different, abandoning anything that remotely resembles the old them.. leaving an empty shell of a person.. sure to collapse under any sort of pressure or conflict.
My friend Jessie, is one of these unfortunate souls.
Jessie was an exceptional dancer.. that was out-going, friendly, and liked to make everyone around her comfortable.
Jessie was an exceptional dancer.. that was out-going, friendly, and liked to make everyone around her comfortable.
Jessie and Paul dated for 5 months. At first it was new.. it was fabulous.. there were fireworks.. she was in love!
But as they spent more and more time together.. Jessie danced less and less.. always finding reasons to get out of lessons and performances. Paul never flat out said he didn't like her dancing... but he wanted her.. to want to be with him.. over any thing else.. and dance was a major distraction as far as he was concerned. Little by little he stifled her light, claiming her out-going.. easy and likable personality, was her flirting and seeking attention from those around her. He hated that she found ease in any situation.. claiming that she lacked humility.
Everything about Jessie changed.. one second at a time.. she transformed from a happy dancing fool, to a pocket-mouse of a shadow.. always in the wake of Paul in an attempt to make him feel superior.
She exited the games as a completely different person than the sunshine light that she came in as.
One of my best friends, Mark, had just started dating this girl, Kaitlin, when all of his sparkles faded.. all of his charismatic fire went out. He slowly faded into her shadow, adopted her meanness, and within a few months.. also became completely unrecognizable. Yes. He got out of the games... as someone totally different than the person he came in as. He abandoned his friends, tact, friendly demeanor. and is forever lost in a sea with no lifesaver. A guy that would do anything for anyone even if he didn't even know them.. became someone that was self centered that thrived in the demise of the happiness around him.
As i continue to reveal my true inner nerd...
When it comes to maintaining your true identity... combine your Peeta mentality.. with that of the sword of Griffindor from Harry Potter.
While we all should remain ourselves... every single one of us could do with some refining.. so.. only take in that which makes you stronger and better as a person.. disregard the things that would destroy your light and goodness. Avoid the retarded people out there that suck. Cuz being with them.... will make you suck too.
The second mentor from the games that we're going to train with is Katniss..
Katniss is admirable for her strength and independence. Plus she's a total Bad A. However.. we're going to avoid repeating things that - although could definitely further us in a fight of hand to hand combat.. shooting people and stuff... - when it comes to this LOVE hunger games.. will only hurt us.
While i'm probably the biggest fan of tough independent women there is.. I'm gonna start by saying STOP.
When it comes to getting out of THIS hunger games.... loading yourself up with armor and building a fortress around yourself and your heart.. will only leave you.. alone. which completely goes against the point of this whole war. So hey.. dummies... I know we all want to suffer the least amount possible.. however.. never letting people in.. will get you absolutely nowhere.
Don't be afraid to feel.. to be vulnerable.. and open to the idea that someone can actually pick you up when you fall. You don't have to just lie there until you heal.
Everyone is afraid of losing the upper hand by actually CARING about the other person in the relationship. I know this is unconventional... and in the eyes of all the tributes fighting, probably a pretty scary survival technique... but if everyone could make a 180 with their thinking... and worry about being the person that cares MORE in their potential relationships.. we might actually have some functional relationships here!
Yes.. this exposes you to potential gunfire... however.. if you put yourself out there.. and get shot.. then at least you can heal and move on.. rather than live in fear of getting hurt! Honesty never hurt anyone in the long run. so.
At least be open to the idea of love. You'll never go anywhere if all you do is shut out potential ways to be happy. You with your big bad weapons of mass destruction.. will only end up in a big bad world.. all tough.. and by yourself.
The final tribute that we're going to take notes from and train with.. is Gale.
Now without getting into a big Team Peeta or Team Gale war.. even though im team peeta cause he's perfect.. whatever.. we're going to learn from the BIG FAT MISTAKE of Gale.. and hopefully come out more victorious than he did.
Gale.. is basically the male version of Katniss..
Everyone feels all sad for gale because they feel like he loved Katniss first and blah blah blah...
Even if you haven't read the books... all you need to know is that yes, apparently Gale loved Katniss for like 5 years.. and he didn't do a dang thing about it. Not ONE. So.. it's nobody's fault but his own when she gets swept off her feet by Peeta.
The lesson we're going to learn here...? FIGHT for the ones you love! When you feel something... SAY SOMETHING!! The worst thing that can happen.. is you get shot......... you heal..and you move on.
Gale had Katniss all to himself for so long and all he did was be her friend.. the strong silent type that.. uh.. ends up by himself.
You have nothing to lose and absolutely everything to gain by going after something you want. So do it!
I'm not trying to rag on you here guys... but this is your JOB. DO YOUR JOB!! Take love by the horns and make some magic happen!! make a move. Ask girls out. The amount of money spent and the extravagance level of the date has absolutely NOTHING to do with anything. You don't have to spend ANY money.. but it is your job to pull out your big guns.. and make some plans. Control that destiny.
I'll tell you right now that there isn't a girl out there that wouldn't love to be swept off her feet.. so get a broom.
Take the first steps. Don't be stuck at home... watching the one that got away be with someone else cuz you were too chicken to say something or do something. Go make some magic happen..
As the world is ending as we know it.. let's all keep in mind that we wont be stuck in this huge sucky battle forever... And once we get out of this war... there lies a whole new set of challenges and rewards. The only thing we have complete control of.. is ourselves. Let's make sure that we are in the best shape possible -fundamentally.. emotionally.. physically.. intellectually.. and characteristically..- with the greatest weapons we can find in order to fight the good fight and come out victorious. Let's become warriors of love.. determined to fill the world with more of it... not determined to beat the system and somehow end up room mates with the closest thing we could find to real love. Do everything you can to be a winner.. Go get fighting. Let the 2012th Love Hunger Games begin...
Until later..
xoxox
-Callymon
March 7, 2012
The Voice ..
How do you create a legacy?
How do you leave something behind for others to remember for centuries.. that will actually have an impact on generations to come?
How would you go about becoming the voice of a generation..? Or writing something that would change a generation.. or more practically speaking.. a single person?
Many writers have done it. They’ve managed to hone in on the emotions of young people.. or not so young people.. enhancing their senses by relating to them on new levels with topics that ignite something in their imagination. Some writers have told stories that have been told many times in history books, adding a new twist, or new perspective, unlocking doors into the minds of the past.
Writing.. and reading.. are both incredible tools that have aided humanity throughout history. Great tools, when used for great things.. in a great way.. usually produce.. well.. great stuff.
For many years i’ve wanted to be every kind of writer; a journalist, novelist, songwriter.
I’ve wanted to be the faceless name behind wonderful stories that people would paint their own pictures to, creating magical lands in far off places with dragons and princesses, and knights in shining armor that ride in at the last second to save the day. I’ve wanted to create an escape for people that are looking for things far beyond their reach, something tangible for the ones holding on to something not within their grasp.
The characters in my dreams often dance from my head onto pages and files in my computer, only to end up somewhere lost in a viral universe, saved under some forgettable name. Nothing extraordinary about their untold stories, nothing excruciating about their created pain, just made up people in a made up world, fighting made up daemons, always coming out alive and well - it all would take such life in my head! .. and then when it came time to put pen to paper (or hands to key board) the characters eyes lost their sparkle.. their love lost it’s fire.. and their stories lost my interest.
After killing myself day after day.. week after week.. in an attempt to create a world i longed to live in.. i realized that i only have one story to tell.
Which brought me here..
So here i am.. pen in hand.. fingers on keyboard.. bringing you reality.
No knights in shining armor. I can’t promise princesses in castles.. i can’t take you to far off lands, but i can take you to the only place in which my mind will allow me to share.. my head.
My name is Callymon, and this is, and has been, my story.
When something happens to someone.. i believe that there’s a reason for it. While trying to find answers to my own questions.. and decipher through my own confusion, i began answering other people’s questions. While attempting to fix my problems.. and my heart.. i started fixing others. And while attempting to tell my own story, i began to tell the stories of others.
I knew there were answers to questions that i would never get.. and problems of my own that would never get solved.. but somehow.. fixing others.. seemed to help.
My life hasn’t been peaches and creme.. as i'm sure you've been able to assume through endless songs and blog posts about brokenness and pain.. but before i went viral, everything out in the universe about my life was exactly what i decided i wanted people to know.
I tried to be very cookie-cutter.. the no surprises, blonde girl with the life that no one questioned.. and no one went digging in.. the surface me. Not necessarily anything that wasn't real, it was just full of pleasantries and 'fine how are you's. I gave the world the bran callymon. Nothing sugar coated, spiced up, or really anything that went beyond ordinary.
Message to the wise... once you start showing who you really are.. there’s really no going back.. cuz once people get a dose of reality.. they never want the fake one-flavor stuff again! You give them sugar, spice, and heart-ache.. and they eat it up! You give them bran again..? and they think they’re eating cardboard. (which i guess isn’t too far off)
As this blog has hit it's 1 year anniversary, I'd first like to say.. thank you for listening. Thank you for reading the stories of the heartbroken.. pissed off.. and wallowing. Every person who has told or sent me their story also thanks you. You as readers have given a voice to many that would otherwise have remained silent... giving the world the bran version of themselves.
By reading the stories of the silent, you've hopefully consciously, or subconsciously challenged the status quo of the world around you. You've hopefully seen the signs of pain or confusion in another's eyes and made a conscious effort to take it away.. or even just to not make it any worse.
The fact that you're reading these words right now really means a lot to me. Thank you.
As any good recognition speech.. let me share with you YOUR favorite parts about the last year in "The Blog You Wish Your Boyfriend Read"...
Favorite/most viewed post: It's About Time
Favorite messages i've received:
From: Karol
callymon I don't mean to creep you out but can I just say I absolutely LOVE your blog! Seriously it is inspiring, uplifting, and you are hilarious! Keep the posts coming girl and I'll keep enjoying them!
From: John
Callymon,
First I would like to complement you on your bomb blogs. Yes, I feel kinda girly reading them, and the fact that I enjoy them makes it even worse. SOOO well done. Secondly If you wanna do a blog post on me Im here, available, and fully clothed. I ll give you a good story may not be true but it would be a good one. No name change will be needed. Ha. Keep Lifting up the people. People need it.
From: Seth
Hey callymon,
So it was your "Masquerade" blog entry back in the middle of May that first caught my attention. I thought you were such a good writer and had such good perspective that I went on to read the next one on "the non-stagnant relationship movement". Good stuff! Keep it up
From: Hannah
call. i hope i dont sound like a complete creep but i am obsesseddddd with your blog. seriously read it at every free time that i have. you are a relationship guru. just want you to know that whether its making me cry laugh or get myself thinking it leaves an impression on me. you're great. i hope all is well. loveyy
From: Zac
while stalking I came across an absolute Gem! something about Tool-a-holics. LMAO. serious! Never new you were such an seasoned writer. Long story short, I was thoroughly impressed/ think maybe you ought to take up journalism or something where you can utilize those skills. Keep it up. I'm subscribed and looking forward to more insight from 'the blog you wish your boyfriend read'. You rock, lets kick it soon.
From: Annie
Callymon.. I know I don't personally know you, but Im one of Emily's best friends. I just read your blog and loved it. I don't really know your story, but have heard parts from My friend and it reminds me of what I have kind of been going through lately. I really enjoyed your blog and how uplifting it was  you seem like such a sweet beautiful girl. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing . Some things in your blog reminded me of my story.
From: Jessica
Hey girl! I miss you! I decided to read your blog the other day.. and can I just tell you that I love you? I don't know how you are not married to ten men right now. For real. I read one post and then I couldn't stop. It was 3 AM and I was like, "I gotta keep going, I've almost read them all.. this girl is good.." Oh heavens, I cried, I laughed and I felt like I could relate to so many things you said. You made sense out of my problems and gave me hope in the future. I wish we would've had a girl talk after one of those $5 movie nights! Haha, anyway, I think you're amazing, beautiful, HILARIOUS, smart, and witty. You're the whole package and I know whoever your husband is will be all of those same things and more. Keep writing!
Love,
Your newest biggest fan!!
My favorite/most surprising discovery: More guys read this than girls.
I've loved every message, comment, re-post, and suggestion. y'all have really been awesome!
Now, you didn't really think that's all the 1 year post was going to be right? Good.
In our society today... in order for someone to continue to do what they love.. to reach any sort of fame, fortune, recognition, or acknowledgment at all, people have to be aware of them.
The recipe for success is: talent + recognition/ awareness = success
Unfortunately... the model looks like.. talent + RECOGNITION/AWARENESS = Success
Unfortunately... talent is but a small part of this model. It doesn't really matter what you can do... as long as a whole bunch of people know you do it.
In the music industry, so many people remain in prominent..influential positions.. that.. lets be honest.. suck. Our world is filled with people that aren't that great.. getting recognized for things that aren't that great.. yet because of their recognition... they have great power.. and a very LOUD voice.
I mean.. honestly... as cool as 'Friday.. Friday... Let's kill ourselves on Friday' is...
... its a dumb song.
Guys... she has 25 million views!!! And don't get me wrong... that's fantastic for her! Props to rebecca black! That's an incredible accomplishment!
But then you look at someone like my friend Rudi...
And her formula remains.. Talent + Recognition/awareness = success.
Rudi has 14,000 views on that.. which is still amazing!! However, it could be... 25 million!!
Unfortunately, In order to get anywhere in life.. you need the recognition in order to verify and legitimize your talent to the world. YOU as an individual have the power to do this.. to fill the radios.. internet.. news stations.. and minds of the world with exactly what interests you. You have the power to change who and what gets recognized for what. The future of fame, fortune, and awareness rests in the hands of every single individual. You give the microphone to exactly who you want to have a voice..
So.
As i sat with friends the other day brain storming of how to get my voice further heard.. and further recognized in this crazy world.. we decided that i need to start with YOU.
As i said earlier, the fact that anyone reads my random thoughts and stories at all is baffling to me.. but hey.. y'all do read it. and hopefully you keep coming back.
The two things in my life that i love more than anything in the world, are my music:
and writing: hence this blog.
I'll work on the talent part, if YOU guys can help me out with the recognition.
Now as you sit there and roll your eyes, thinking, oh great.. another thing on fb that annoying people post.. that nobody responds to... spamming the universe with their annoyingness.. knock it off.
I usually don't do this.. and wont in the future. I'll continue to fill the walls of this page with stories and thoughts and randomness.. but in spirit of this 1 year anniversary post.. i am asking you, if you enjoy reading this craziness, to share it with whoever you can. If you repost it on fb.. link it on your blog.. or just spread the word to your friends.. I would love you forever.
In every issue.. song.. article.. power.. and confrontation... remember that you have a voice! You absolutely have a say! And you truly can change the world one moment at a time.
This last year has been awesome! Thanks for giving me a way to purge my thoughts! Thanks for your stories.. thanks for being here. right now. you guys rock.
Happy Birthday "TBYWYBR" (the blog you wish your BF read)..
Here's to the next year! Cheers..
Until later..
xoxo
-Callymon
How do you leave something behind for others to remember for centuries.. that will actually have an impact on generations to come?
How would you go about becoming the voice of a generation..? Or writing something that would change a generation.. or more practically speaking.. a single person?
Many writers have done it. They’ve managed to hone in on the emotions of young people.. or not so young people.. enhancing their senses by relating to them on new levels with topics that ignite something in their imagination. Some writers have told stories that have been told many times in history books, adding a new twist, or new perspective, unlocking doors into the minds of the past.
Writing.. and reading.. are both incredible tools that have aided humanity throughout history. Great tools, when used for great things.. in a great way.. usually produce.. well.. great stuff.
For many years i’ve wanted to be every kind of writer; a journalist, novelist, songwriter.
I’ve wanted to be the faceless name behind wonderful stories that people would paint their own pictures to, creating magical lands in far off places with dragons and princesses, and knights in shining armor that ride in at the last second to save the day. I’ve wanted to create an escape for people that are looking for things far beyond their reach, something tangible for the ones holding on to something not within their grasp.
The characters in my dreams often dance from my head onto pages and files in my computer, only to end up somewhere lost in a viral universe, saved under some forgettable name. Nothing extraordinary about their untold stories, nothing excruciating about their created pain, just made up people in a made up world, fighting made up daemons, always coming out alive and well - it all would take such life in my head! .. and then when it came time to put pen to paper (or hands to key board) the characters eyes lost their sparkle.. their love lost it’s fire.. and their stories lost my interest.
After killing myself day after day.. week after week.. in an attempt to create a world i longed to live in.. i realized that i only have one story to tell.
Which brought me here..
So here i am.. pen in hand.. fingers on keyboard.. bringing you reality.
No knights in shining armor. I can’t promise princesses in castles.. i can’t take you to far off lands, but i can take you to the only place in which my mind will allow me to share.. my head.
My name is Callymon, and this is, and has been, my story.
When something happens to someone.. i believe that there’s a reason for it. While trying to find answers to my own questions.. and decipher through my own confusion, i began answering other people’s questions. While attempting to fix my problems.. and my heart.. i started fixing others. And while attempting to tell my own story, i began to tell the stories of others.
I knew there were answers to questions that i would never get.. and problems of my own that would never get solved.. but somehow.. fixing others.. seemed to help.
My life hasn’t been peaches and creme.. as i'm sure you've been able to assume through endless songs and blog posts about brokenness and pain.. but before i went viral, everything out in the universe about my life was exactly what i decided i wanted people to know.
I tried to be very cookie-cutter.. the no surprises, blonde girl with the life that no one questioned.. and no one went digging in.. the surface me. Not necessarily anything that wasn't real, it was just full of pleasantries and 'fine how are you's. I gave the world the bran callymon. Nothing sugar coated, spiced up, or really anything that went beyond ordinary.
Message to the wise... once you start showing who you really are.. there’s really no going back.. cuz once people get a dose of reality.. they never want the fake one-flavor stuff again! You give them sugar, spice, and heart-ache.. and they eat it up! You give them bran again..? and they think they’re eating cardboard. (which i guess isn’t too far off)
As this blog has hit it's 1 year anniversary, I'd first like to say.. thank you for listening. Thank you for reading the stories of the heartbroken.. pissed off.. and wallowing. Every person who has told or sent me their story also thanks you. You as readers have given a voice to many that would otherwise have remained silent... giving the world the bran version of themselves.
By reading the stories of the silent, you've hopefully consciously, or subconsciously challenged the status quo of the world around you. You've hopefully seen the signs of pain or confusion in another's eyes and made a conscious effort to take it away.. or even just to not make it any worse.
The fact that you're reading these words right now really means a lot to me. Thank you.
As any good recognition speech.. let me share with you YOUR favorite parts about the last year in "The Blog You Wish Your Boyfriend Read"...
Favorite/most viewed post: It's About Time
Favorite messages i've received:
From: Karol
callymon I don't mean to creep you out but can I just say I absolutely LOVE your blog! Seriously it is inspiring, uplifting, and you are hilarious! Keep the posts coming girl and I'll keep enjoying them!
From: John
Callymon,
First I would like to complement you on your bomb blogs. Yes, I feel kinda girly reading them, and the fact that I enjoy them makes it even worse. SOOO well done. Secondly If you wanna do a blog post on me Im here, available, and fully clothed. I ll give you a good story may not be true but it would be a good one. No name change will be needed. Ha. Keep Lifting up the people. People need it.
From: Seth
Hey callymon,
So it was your "Masquerade" blog entry back in the middle of May that first caught my attention. I thought you were such a good writer and had such good perspective that I went on to read the next one on "the non-stagnant relationship movement". Good stuff! Keep it up
From: Hannah
call. i hope i dont sound like a complete creep but i am obsesseddddd with your blog. seriously read it at every free time that i have. you are a relationship guru. just want you to know that whether its making me cry laugh or get myself thinking it leaves an impression on me. you're great. i hope all is well. loveyy
From: Zac
while stalking I came across an absolute Gem! something about Tool-a-holics. LMAO. serious! Never new you were such an seasoned writer. Long story short, I was thoroughly impressed/ think maybe you ought to take up journalism or something where you can utilize those skills. Keep it up. I'm subscribed and looking forward to more insight from 'the blog you wish your boyfriend read'. You rock, lets kick it soon.
From: Annie
Callymon.. I know I don't personally know you, but Im one of Emily's best friends. I just read your blog and loved it. I don't really know your story, but have heard parts from My friend and it reminds me of what I have kind of been going through lately. I really enjoyed your blog and how uplifting it was  you seem like such a sweet beautiful girl. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing . Some things in your blog reminded me of my story.
From: Jessica
Hey girl! I miss you! I decided to read your blog the other day.. and can I just tell you that I love you? I don't know how you are not married to ten men right now. For real. I read one post and then I couldn't stop. It was 3 AM and I was like, "I gotta keep going, I've almost read them all.. this girl is good.." Oh heavens, I cried, I laughed and I felt like I could relate to so many things you said. You made sense out of my problems and gave me hope in the future. I wish we would've had a girl talk after one of those $5 movie nights! Haha, anyway, I think you're amazing, beautiful, HILARIOUS, smart, and witty. You're the whole package and I know whoever your husband is will be all of those same things and more. Keep writing!
Love,
Your newest biggest fan!!
My favorite/most surprising discovery: More guys read this than girls.
I've loved every message, comment, re-post, and suggestion. y'all have really been awesome!
Now, you didn't really think that's all the 1 year post was going to be right? Good.
In our society today... in order for someone to continue to do what they love.. to reach any sort of fame, fortune, recognition, or acknowledgment at all, people have to be aware of them.
The recipe for success is: talent + recognition/ awareness = success
Unfortunately... the model looks like.. talent + RECOGNITION/AWARENESS = Success
Unfortunately... talent is but a small part of this model. It doesn't really matter what you can do... as long as a whole bunch of people know you do it.
In the music industry, so many people remain in prominent..influential positions.. that.. lets be honest.. suck. Our world is filled with people that aren't that great.. getting recognized for things that aren't that great.. yet because of their recognition... they have great power.. and a very LOUD voice.
I mean.. honestly... as cool as 'Friday.. Friday... Let's kill ourselves on Friday' is...
... its a dumb song.
Guys... she has 25 million views!!! And don't get me wrong... that's fantastic for her! Props to rebecca black! That's an incredible accomplishment!
But then you look at someone like my friend Rudi...
And her formula remains.. Talent + Recognition/awareness = success.
Rudi has 14,000 views on that.. which is still amazing!! However, it could be... 25 million!!
Unfortunately, In order to get anywhere in life.. you need the recognition in order to verify and legitimize your talent to the world. YOU as an individual have the power to do this.. to fill the radios.. internet.. news stations.. and minds of the world with exactly what interests you. You have the power to change who and what gets recognized for what. The future of fame, fortune, and awareness rests in the hands of every single individual. You give the microphone to exactly who you want to have a voice..
So.
As i sat with friends the other day brain storming of how to get my voice further heard.. and further recognized in this crazy world.. we decided that i need to start with YOU.
As i said earlier, the fact that anyone reads my random thoughts and stories at all is baffling to me.. but hey.. y'all do read it. and hopefully you keep coming back.
The two things in my life that i love more than anything in the world, are my music:
and writing: hence this blog.
I'll work on the talent part, if YOU guys can help me out with the recognition.
Now as you sit there and roll your eyes, thinking, oh great.. another thing on fb that annoying people post.. that nobody responds to... spamming the universe with their annoyingness.. knock it off.
I usually don't do this.. and wont in the future. I'll continue to fill the walls of this page with stories and thoughts and randomness.. but in spirit of this 1 year anniversary post.. i am asking you, if you enjoy reading this craziness, to share it with whoever you can. If you repost it on fb.. link it on your blog.. or just spread the word to your friends.. I would love you forever.
In every issue.. song.. article.. power.. and confrontation... remember that you have a voice! You absolutely have a say! And you truly can change the world one moment at a time.
This last year has been awesome! Thanks for giving me a way to purge my thoughts! Thanks for your stories.. thanks for being here. right now. you guys rock.
Happy Birthday "TBYWYBR" (the blog you wish your BF read)..
Here's to the next year! Cheers..
Until later..
xoxo
-Callymon
February 29, 2012
Battle Scars..
Love is a very interesting thing.
We often times walk through fire to gain scars that we can later reflect on for strength.. Our battle scars.
We say things we don't mean and don't say things we wish we would've in times of pain.. and being unable to predict the outcome of any situation, or the thoughts of another.. many times we choose wrong paths, take wrong turns, and find ourselves searching for heros and lighthouses to lead us back to ourselves.
We choose professions and dreams as barely grown children to change them again and again.. as we grow into ourselves and our own purposes.
We love people.. we hurt people.. and in turn suffer the same consequences of the cycle of love.
We try and control the speed of our existence when one thing remains universally constant and consistent: Time.
Just because we sit down on an escalator doesn't mean it stops moving. Just because we don't want to grow up doesn't mean we won't continue to grow old. I read a quote somewhere that said if we did everything that people say will make us live longer... and avoided the things which could potentially shorten our lives a few years... if we walk on egg shells and avoid all danger signs... we wont be living the years that we've been trying to preserve. Ya, maybe we'll live to be 112... lying in a bed... with a blank storybook of a life. We'll have nothing to pass on to our next generations, looking to learn from our mistakes and repeat our adventures.
I believe if we don't learn from the bad in our lives and the lives of those around us.. that we're doing just that.. we're sitting down on our escalator.. we're forfeiting our playing jersey for this tricky game of life and love.
It is said that when an elderly person dies, an entire library burns to the ground. That the life and experiences they've collected, the wisdom they've gained, and the love they shared and felt, will never again have an exact match. Each a unique snowflake of a person, melting one by one, forfeiting their unique design to the life after.
Molly Aggleby is no exception.
Now before i get shot, let me clear something up.... Molly hasn't left us yet, nor does she plan to until she's ready. But the wisdom of this woman, and the stories that lie in the wrinkles of her heart are too precious to let burn to the ground in any future.
Molly lives next door to my grandma and has become an avid reader of 'The Blog You Wish Your Boyfriend Read'.. and along with the stories of the broken hearted.. Molly rang me up to share her library of love with the readers that humor her favorite 21 year old. She wanted her drama, heart break, and happy ending documented before she could no longer remember the stories that turned her hair grey one by one and made her the woman she is today.
Molly put her good faith in me and made me swear over her freshly brewed lemonade and cookies in her plush living room full of memories that i would get this right.
"There's always a calm before a storm.. and always a sigh after one.." she began. "You think you're at the end of your wits and at the full capacity of emotion.. and then burdens are lifted, and sanity appears.."
You see, life's a tricky thing. It tries to see what we're made of at all times, testing us and pushing us to go farther and farther until it sees that we're close to breaking. Then, and only then, at the lowest of lows does it usher in our saviors. Then does life let us taste the good that we've waited through the bad for.
They say that when you live your life the way it was meant to be lived, that you should have no regrets looking back.. Well. in each of Molly's scars she held a regret. Not something she would necessarily change now.. but things that have plagued her mind and heart for years on end. Forgive the brevity of the stories, for she had many..
Molly had a boy at one time in her life, Martin, that she would've given the world to if she could've... she loved and bled for Martin until it almost drove her clinically mad.
Martin was Molly's first love. Her first regret. And her first lesson for my readers.
Even at her ripe age of 83 you can tell that Molly was a grade A dime in her day. She had many boys coming after her heart, but her eyes never saw anyone else. Martin promised her forever.
After giving her heart to Martin for 6 months she decided that she LOVE loved him more than in the way that other 16 year olds loved their boyfriends. Martin went away one weekend, and when he returned she planned on telling him. On his return, Martin confessed that he had cheated on her with her best friend and that they were in love.
Molly then got the first taste of real darkness that she had ever had. At the time she regretted not opening her eyes to the possibility of reality around her while she was lost in her love trance, and had held on to that grudge and hardship through her next relationship. She later.. much later.. realized that this was all a blessing in disguise. When Martin and her ex-best friend got married and divorced, Martin remarrying 3 times, she giggled at her sweet karma and wished him well.
Her lesson for me.. for us.. is that.. things happen.. that are supposed to happen. At the time, they seem like the end of the world as you know it. But someday, you'll look back and giggle with relief that you dodged bullets and got healthy scars to prove you fought hard for your happy ending.
Her second love brought a very different lesson, and a very different regret.
She knew she loved John the second date they went on. Through their deep conversations it became very apparent that saying 'i love you' was just about the biggest deal in the world to John. That he planned on saying it to very few girls in his life. Through out their relationship of a year, John was very back and forth with his feelings. Molly was as patient as she could be and let him run his course. Around 5 months into it, when she felt like she would be lying if she didn't tell him exactly how she felt, she went to him, and told him that she loved him. He said it back hesitantly and she knew he didn't mean it. She immediately asked him to take it back and told him to forget it.. that their love would eventually grow and she was just lost in the moment when she babbled out her forbidden words.
At 8 months they ended their back and forth and decided that they should be friends, because in love they had given it enough time and it didn't feel right.
At 11 months, Molly was facing a serious emotional crisis and went to the aid of her best friend John. While he comforted her through it, and discussed her right out of her misery, she was happy to be with him. As she turned to leave her friend he said, "Ok, well, i love you".
In a family where you didn't walk out the front door, hang up the telephone, or finish a letter without those ritualistic 3 words, she was sure that it had to be a mistake out of habit. that it had just slipped out. His family was the same as hers, he must be dreading saying it and embarrassed. So she ignored it and game him a hug.
"I love you a lot you know" he said again.
Half lost in confusion, and half trying to quickly melt the hard shell she had built around her heart from her first rejection, she convinced herself that again, he meant it as a friend.
She didn't know what to say. She didn't want to be the fool. so she waited.
"I hope you know how much i care about you molly, i know i don't show it as often as i should.." he said with desperate hope.. or pain?.. in his eyes.
"no, i know.. lo-love you too John" she said with a half hearted hug as she scurried off, not sure of what to think.
Left in this stupor, unaware of his intentions of this reckless confession.. she brushed it aside. Positive that it was an accident that he was too embarrassed to correct.
They didn't talk for several weeks, and he started dating another girl. A few months later, they were engaged.
The one mistake that Molly made in their entire relationship, would forever haunt her memory and her conscience. She loved him back, he had to of known that she loved him back, yet, in a moment that she was engulfed in her own fear of previous rejection, still holding on to pain she hadn't forgiven, she lost the man she loved.
Her lesson to us all.. was that love is nothing to be tampered with. At any time.. in any moment or fraction of a second, someone could change their mind and their heart. There are no accidents when it comes to emotion and instinct, and any time you feel them and leave them unspoken you're depriving yourself of possibilities. The fear of rejection and the pain we all hold so dear in our hearts, that we're determined to never let go of, are molehills that keep us from mountains. Never live a day that holds the possibility of creating a ghost that will forever haunt your mind, especially when it comes to love.
For if they do not love you back, you will surely get over it. But if you are ever left wondering- you never will. You owe it to yourself to always love as deeply as your heart desires you to.
Only then, when Molly was mourning her lost sanity, in the fetal position of love, did she find what she was looking for. Only then did life explain her fate to her..
For then she met George.
As this blog comes to a close Molly leaves us with a final lesson... That when it comes to love, we should leave no regrets, and never give in to our own heart ache and fears. That we should truly believe in the fairy tale happy ending and be willing to snatch up a pen and write it ourselves. Molly and George were married 54 years before he left her. And he gave her enough love and memories in those 54 years to last her until the end of her days. George came when she thought she would most likely die alone. That there was no one in the world that she would love more than Martin.. and more than John. George came and swept her off her feet when she had given up on love, and he made her realize that her scars made her compassionate. Her open eyes gave her understanding when people make mistakes that nobody is perfect. Nobody is exempt from reality. Her John gave her the wisdom to never let a day pass that she didn't express the love she felt for those around her. And her George picked up all her pieces and made them into a wonderful masterpiece.
The passing of time is inevitable. However your life is yours for the writing. Don't waste one page, fill each of them with adventures and heart ache. Get as many scars as you can so that when you find your George or Molly, they'll know that you fought hard for them.
Until later..
xoxo
- Callymon
We often times walk through fire to gain scars that we can later reflect on for strength.. Our battle scars.
We say things we don't mean and don't say things we wish we would've in times of pain.. and being unable to predict the outcome of any situation, or the thoughts of another.. many times we choose wrong paths, take wrong turns, and find ourselves searching for heros and lighthouses to lead us back to ourselves.
We choose professions and dreams as barely grown children to change them again and again.. as we grow into ourselves and our own purposes.
We love people.. we hurt people.. and in turn suffer the same consequences of the cycle of love.
We try and control the speed of our existence when one thing remains universally constant and consistent: Time.
Just because we sit down on an escalator doesn't mean it stops moving. Just because we don't want to grow up doesn't mean we won't continue to grow old. I read a quote somewhere that said if we did everything that people say will make us live longer... and avoided the things which could potentially shorten our lives a few years... if we walk on egg shells and avoid all danger signs... we wont be living the years that we've been trying to preserve. Ya, maybe we'll live to be 112... lying in a bed... with a blank storybook of a life. We'll have nothing to pass on to our next generations, looking to learn from our mistakes and repeat our adventures.
I believe if we don't learn from the bad in our lives and the lives of those around us.. that we're doing just that.. we're sitting down on our escalator.. we're forfeiting our playing jersey for this tricky game of life and love.
It is said that when an elderly person dies, an entire library burns to the ground. That the life and experiences they've collected, the wisdom they've gained, and the love they shared and felt, will never again have an exact match. Each a unique snowflake of a person, melting one by one, forfeiting their unique design to the life after.
Molly Aggleby is no exception.
Now before i get shot, let me clear something up.... Molly hasn't left us yet, nor does she plan to until she's ready. But the wisdom of this woman, and the stories that lie in the wrinkles of her heart are too precious to let burn to the ground in any future.
Molly lives next door to my grandma and has become an avid reader of 'The Blog You Wish Your Boyfriend Read'.. and along with the stories of the broken hearted.. Molly rang me up to share her library of love with the readers that humor her favorite 21 year old. She wanted her drama, heart break, and happy ending documented before she could no longer remember the stories that turned her hair grey one by one and made her the woman she is today.
Molly put her good faith in me and made me swear over her freshly brewed lemonade and cookies in her plush living room full of memories that i would get this right.
"There's always a calm before a storm.. and always a sigh after one.." she began. "You think you're at the end of your wits and at the full capacity of emotion.. and then burdens are lifted, and sanity appears.."
You see, life's a tricky thing. It tries to see what we're made of at all times, testing us and pushing us to go farther and farther until it sees that we're close to breaking. Then, and only then, at the lowest of lows does it usher in our saviors. Then does life let us taste the good that we've waited through the bad for.
They say that when you live your life the way it was meant to be lived, that you should have no regrets looking back.. Well. in each of Molly's scars she held a regret. Not something she would necessarily change now.. but things that have plagued her mind and heart for years on end. Forgive the brevity of the stories, for she had many..
Molly had a boy at one time in her life, Martin, that she would've given the world to if she could've... she loved and bled for Martin until it almost drove her clinically mad.
Martin was Molly's first love. Her first regret. And her first lesson for my readers.
Even at her ripe age of 83 you can tell that Molly was a grade A dime in her day. She had many boys coming after her heart, but her eyes never saw anyone else. Martin promised her forever.
After giving her heart to Martin for 6 months she decided that she LOVE loved him more than in the way that other 16 year olds loved their boyfriends. Martin went away one weekend, and when he returned she planned on telling him. On his return, Martin confessed that he had cheated on her with her best friend and that they were in love.
Molly then got the first taste of real darkness that she had ever had. At the time she regretted not opening her eyes to the possibility of reality around her while she was lost in her love trance, and had held on to that grudge and hardship through her next relationship. She later.. much later.. realized that this was all a blessing in disguise. When Martin and her ex-best friend got married and divorced, Martin remarrying 3 times, she giggled at her sweet karma and wished him well.
Her lesson for me.. for us.. is that.. things happen.. that are supposed to happen. At the time, they seem like the end of the world as you know it. But someday, you'll look back and giggle with relief that you dodged bullets and got healthy scars to prove you fought hard for your happy ending.
Her second love brought a very different lesson, and a very different regret.
She knew she loved John the second date they went on. Through their deep conversations it became very apparent that saying 'i love you' was just about the biggest deal in the world to John. That he planned on saying it to very few girls in his life. Through out their relationship of a year, John was very back and forth with his feelings. Molly was as patient as she could be and let him run his course. Around 5 months into it, when she felt like she would be lying if she didn't tell him exactly how she felt, she went to him, and told him that she loved him. He said it back hesitantly and she knew he didn't mean it. She immediately asked him to take it back and told him to forget it.. that their love would eventually grow and she was just lost in the moment when she babbled out her forbidden words.
At 8 months they ended their back and forth and decided that they should be friends, because in love they had given it enough time and it didn't feel right.
At 11 months, Molly was facing a serious emotional crisis and went to the aid of her best friend John. While he comforted her through it, and discussed her right out of her misery, she was happy to be with him. As she turned to leave her friend he said, "Ok, well, i love you".
In a family where you didn't walk out the front door, hang up the telephone, or finish a letter without those ritualistic 3 words, she was sure that it had to be a mistake out of habit. that it had just slipped out. His family was the same as hers, he must be dreading saying it and embarrassed. So she ignored it and game him a hug.
"I love you a lot you know" he said again.
Half lost in confusion, and half trying to quickly melt the hard shell she had built around her heart from her first rejection, she convinced herself that again, he meant it as a friend.
She didn't know what to say. She didn't want to be the fool. so she waited.
"I hope you know how much i care about you molly, i know i don't show it as often as i should.." he said with desperate hope.. or pain?.. in his eyes.
"no, i know.. lo-love you too John" she said with a half hearted hug as she scurried off, not sure of what to think.
Left in this stupor, unaware of his intentions of this reckless confession.. she brushed it aside. Positive that it was an accident that he was too embarrassed to correct.
They didn't talk for several weeks, and he started dating another girl. A few months later, they were engaged.
The one mistake that Molly made in their entire relationship, would forever haunt her memory and her conscience. She loved him back, he had to of known that she loved him back, yet, in a moment that she was engulfed in her own fear of previous rejection, still holding on to pain she hadn't forgiven, she lost the man she loved.
Her lesson to us all.. was that love is nothing to be tampered with. At any time.. in any moment or fraction of a second, someone could change their mind and their heart. There are no accidents when it comes to emotion and instinct, and any time you feel them and leave them unspoken you're depriving yourself of possibilities. The fear of rejection and the pain we all hold so dear in our hearts, that we're determined to never let go of, are molehills that keep us from mountains. Never live a day that holds the possibility of creating a ghost that will forever haunt your mind, especially when it comes to love.
For if they do not love you back, you will surely get over it. But if you are ever left wondering- you never will. You owe it to yourself to always love as deeply as your heart desires you to.
Only then, when Molly was mourning her lost sanity, in the fetal position of love, did she find what she was looking for. Only then did life explain her fate to her..
For then she met George.
As this blog comes to a close Molly leaves us with a final lesson... That when it comes to love, we should leave no regrets, and never give in to our own heart ache and fears. That we should truly believe in the fairy tale happy ending and be willing to snatch up a pen and write it ourselves. Molly and George were married 54 years before he left her. And he gave her enough love and memories in those 54 years to last her until the end of her days. George came when she thought she would most likely die alone. That there was no one in the world that she would love more than Martin.. and more than John. George came and swept her off her feet when she had given up on love, and he made her realize that her scars made her compassionate. Her open eyes gave her understanding when people make mistakes that nobody is perfect. Nobody is exempt from reality. Her John gave her the wisdom to never let a day pass that she didn't express the love she felt for those around her. And her George picked up all her pieces and made them into a wonderful masterpiece.
The passing of time is inevitable. However your life is yours for the writing. Don't waste one page, fill each of them with adventures and heart ache. Get as many scars as you can so that when you find your George or Molly, they'll know that you fought hard for them.
Until later..
xoxo
- Callymon
February 15, 2012
Roses are red.. Bruises are blue..
Roses are red... bruises are blue... I'm glad it's over.. just like all of you.
After watching the movie 'Crazy Stupid Love'.. I became obsessed with the idea of having a “move”.. a finale.. a cherry on top in a final attempt to make someone fall in love with you.
** JUST so we're clear.. these things are for people looking to seal the deal... if you're not to that point yet.. if you haven't already been dating someone... you probably shouldn't try these.. you'll just look like a creepy stalker.
Congratulations...We made it through yet another year of flowers and candy..awkward encounters with creepy strangers lookin for love.. a 2 hour wait at every restaurant.. and every copy of the notebook off the shelves.. out of the red-box kiosks.. and in every single girls' dvd player.
All the single girls can now start planning their strategy for getting a boyfriend in the next 364 days.. crossing off this year's plan as yet another failed attempt.
All the single guys can now make eye contact with girls again... turn their phones back on... and stop pretending they have a life threatening disease.
Let's face it.. it doesn't matter if you go to love-bashing parties... on BFD's (best friend dates).. girls movie nights drooling over Channing Tatum.. or anything and everything else to try and get your mind off of this day... it's still gonna SUCK if you're single.
Valentines day is a single guy's NIGHTMARE! Unless they're pretty dang sure of the status of whatever is going on in their lives.. they're probably hiding in a hole JUST as deep as the single girls are.. both dateless.. both hating everything in any shade of red.. pink... swirly or heartsy.
The exception to this Where’s Waldo mentality is the classic hopeless romantic looking to further his relationship quest. If you're one of these hopeless romantic types... you can give a HUGE thank you to society for giving you an entire day that you don't have to explain any over the top cheesy behavior or ridiculous displays of affection. On this day you don't have to "play it cool".. you can take your beginning stage relationship and act as boldly as you dare! To all of you that just dropped MAD cash on roses.. and chocolate.. and stuffed animals.. and limos.. and violin players... on girls you just met..Woo! More power to you.
If you're in the stage of a relationship where it's still pretty casual.. it could go either way.. to the alter or down the toilet.. and you come upon February 13th.. all the sudden it goes from ...'we'll see how this goes.. we're just hangin out...' to.. 'I DONT KNOW WHAT SHE'S THINKING.. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M THINKING!! if i do something for Valentines day.. she'll think I'm in love with her!!! and we don't want that..yet... but if i do NOTHING.. what if she thinks i don't like her at ALL!?!.. i should probably just not talk to her from feb 12 to mayyyybe like late afternoon on the 15th to play it safe.. ya.. we'll go with.. phone off... no contact... and then pretend like it never happened... SOLID! break on three... ready.. BREAK!"
Love is like money... it's AWESOME for those with a never ending supply... and it SUCKS for those that go without.
So while the people in love give a big shout out to the candy and flower industry.. loving themselves even more for picking a winner that stayed by their side regardless of this treacherous day of cheesy facebook posts...
While the single people plan out their gym time tomorrow to compensate for the emotional chocolate binge they're now seriously regretting...
I'd like to give my own shout out to the creators of this holiday for giving 'The Blog You Wish Your Boyfriend Read' a reason to blog about nothing in particular.. other than love itself. It will be more random than other posts... but bear with me. Thank you Valentines day.
These are the Day-After Valentines Day cards that i'm sending to all of you...
To: On the Fencers..
Women have a code. We have a language. We never say what we mean. We might as well be speaking friggin chinese.. because men will never understand us. We're given a book at our 'secret meeting' in the 5th grade that explains how we're meant to run the world but will choose to take a passenger seat in many instances so that people don't catch on to our genius ways and manipulative skills.
We constantly wait for our clueless boyfriends to read between the lines.. get the picture.. get the billboard size hints.. pull their heads out of their butts and 'care' like we want them to.
Girls... i have news for you that could rock your world.
They're a lot more ignorant than we think. They don’t analyze every word they say before they send it wondering how you’re gonna take it. Sometimes they say things that they don’t mean.. they occasionally stumble across things that we take as super offensive.. ON ACCIDENT. Sometimes you just need to take what they say with a grain of salt... take a text exactly as they wrote it. Leave all possible double meanings out of your mind.. stop stressing over his poor grammar.. and leave the decoding to the CIA! Most of the time they don’t mean to make you pull your hair out! They are completely unaware of the fact that you spaced out the time between text messages perfectly.. that you’ve come up with a scientific formula for the perfect balance.. the middle ground somewhere between needy.. cute.. and desperate.
They don’t know!!
Their life's work and goals are to 'figure us out'... what the crap is there to figure out?!
flowers + chocolate + 'you're beautiful' + 'i love you' = happiness. duuh.
Guys.. I’m here for you.
In one of my favorite movies of all time.. The Swan Princess.. we reveal a liiiittle bit of this male ignorance..
Derek and Odette grew up together from infancy.. Their parents planned on them getting married and were just WAITING for them to fall in love. When sparks finally flew.. Derek asked Odette to marry him. Being a chick.. she wanted to know why he loved her. In reply to her request.. obviously being the hopeless romantic that he is.. he looked into her eyes and said.. "you're all i've ever wanted... you're beautiful!" In regards to him professing his love...... for her face....... she said "thank you! but what else...?" Being a DUDE. he replies..."what else.. is there?"
Really derek?..? His lovely trusted best friend hits the nail on the head when he tells him... "you should write a book... how to offend women in 5 syllables or less."
Guys have a guy code... that goes something like this..
Don’t scam on your homeboy's chick.. but it happens.
Butt slap in sports game = encouraging..
Butt slap outside of sports game = you're gonna get laid out in about 5 seconds..
Same with holding hands.. during a football kickoff.. its promoting team unity.. anywhere else.. you better WATCH yourself.
and.. if you ever get a girl to crack the girl code.. to explain this crazy phenomenon of 'women-hood' .. you obviously make copies.. and share with the rest of them..
well guys.. helllooooo... its posted on the internet for all y'all to see. you can thank me later.
Trust me. we WANT you to figure us out! we don't WANT the secret to our happiness to be a secret!! we just want to be happy!!
You have to realize that.. 21st century or not... you guys are the playmakers of the relationship. As much as i absolutely do NOT want to feed into your male egos.. there's only soooo much a chick can do.. even if she's forward.. before she's left sitting at home waiting for you to call.
I know i've blogged before about being completely honest with your feelings.. being BOLD and doing something about your current single predicament... i know all of you roll your eyes and claim you're exactly as single as you want to be.. but hellooo.. guys.. Valentines day is over.. we can continue being honest with ourselves now.... EVERYTHING in the world is better when you're in love. so.
There comes a time... when a girl.. or guy for that matter... is completely unsure of the intentions of the other person. At this time.. they are looking for ANY sign that this current relationship thing will move forward, before resorting to putting up a big friend-zone wall in fear of being wrong.
Nobody wants to be the one that cares more.. assumes.. and looks like a fool.
Do i think that once a guy gives the go ahead, that a girl has to reciprocate this affection? ABSO-freakin-LUTELY! But i'm sorry to say.. again... guys.. no pressure.. but you have the control. You're in the drivers seat here... MAKE SOME FRIGGIN MAGIC HAPPEN so you don't have to spend another Feb. 14th playing halo.. naming body parts and comparing things you can't control.
Nobody can read minds in a relationship, yet everybody tries to. Let's make this a little easier folks.. narrate what's going on inside your head... at least a little bit. If you don't, you will remain on the fence.. in that in-between stage, until the other person can't take the uncertainty.. and they move on.
Be BOLD..
Love,
trying to use telepathy to make my phone ring... isn't working out so much.
To: Those of you looking to seal the deal....
In the movie.. the lovely Ryan Gosling is asked by the hilarious Emma Stone what his big GRAND move was to 'seal the deal'.. whether her definition is the same as mine.. is irrelevant. Our callymon definition today is the thing that moves a relationship from.. "I have no idea if we're dating other people".. to.. "i love this person. wow. ok. cool. lets DO THIS!"
When it comes to picking a BIG GRAND MOVE.. you obviously need to play to your strengths...
If you're not such a good kisser.. and your move.. is to kiss them..? Bad friggin idea. pick something else.
If you're an excellent cook.. and you choose to make them dinner... bingo! You understand. Have a cookie.
In the movie... his move is to do the dirty dancing lift. He proceeds to lift the chick above his head.. throw her.. and catch her all slowly.. breaking down any doubt she had in her mind. (although i can't imagine much initial doubt... he's ryan gosling.. duh.) I wouldn't exactly recommend this move.. unless you look like Thor... cuz if you drop the chick from lack of practice.. or lack of biceps.. (no judgement here).. it might make your relationship wander south a little bit... i mean as much as dropping someone on their head says.. 'ok now LOVE ME!'... you may want to make them brownies.
If you have a grand move.. that's great. If NOT... there are little moves that can definitely push you in that "love me" direction.
** JUST so we're clear.. these things are for people looking to seal the deal... if you're not to that point yet.. if you haven't already been dating someone... you probably shouldn't try these.. you'll just look like a creepy stalker.
An example of a smaller - yet still effective move - is strategic texting. If you text them AT LEAST in the morning and before you go to bed.. they know you're thinking about them when you wake up.. and before you go to sleep. Plus.. any girl that gets a 'good morning beautiful' text.. will melt like butter on a hot roll.. and be eating out of the palm of your hand.
Basically when it comes to sealing the deal... girls notice everything. So subtle things that show them how much you care about them.. are very much appreciated.. and can go a long way!
Give them something to journal about.. and you can go right ahead and add a #winning hash-tag on your love life.
Love,
A back-hug and holding their hand in public goes a lot further in the love-book than you think
To: The skeptics.
People have this theory... that when things happen slowly in life .. that they work out better. That if they JUST take their time and purposely slow things down.. there will be a much better outcome than if they let things take their natural course.
I am one of these people. Or at least i used to be.
With all the relationships around me down here in Utah County... there are 2 mentalities... you can't possibly be in love with someone until you've dated them for 6 months.. then dropping the L bomb is in the natural vicinity of where it should be... OR... 3 dates..? I LOVE YOU!!!!!
While thinking to myself.. wow.
that's it.. wow.
I have decided to further study this subject and work it all out in my mind.
What i came up with will be an ENTIRE post in itself..
but to sum it up in this lovely Valentine..
As things happen... LET THEM HAPPEN!! However fast or slow things happen... don't let opportunities pass just because something is going faster or slower than you anticipated! Go with the flow! Let your heart feel exactly what it wants to!! Have a little faith! and everything will be just fine!
Whether you fall in love in 2 weeks... or 2 months.. or 24 hours... act on what you feel. You could miss out on something great if you dont!
Love,
Love is the best kind of air freshener.
Another year has come and gone and all we have to show...
is yet another holiday we missed the mistletoe..
a band-aid for the broken hearts is what i'm here to give
as callymon attempts to change the single lives we live
the holiday of getting fat on chocolate covered tears
and adding one more lonely night to all the previous years..
This day we'll put behind us as the last and final bow
to go find what we're missing.. like rachel in 'the vow'.
Good day my fellow stalkers.. goodnight my distant friends
i hope you've laughed through broken hearts as this blogs at an end.
Live. laugh. love. and smile :) today is a new day. thank goodness.
Before i sign off... in the spirit of Valentines day.. i'll leave all you love birds on a happy note with my favorite love song i've ever written... (it's a few years old so don't judge it.. ) it's called 'I Found You'..
Enjoy!
Until later..
xoxo
-Callymon
Ps.. the 1 year anniversary post of Callymon.blogspot is coming soon! woo! thanx for reading!
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