.. World of Glass..

There are few things about me.. that if you have been reading my blog.. you know.. or if i told you you wouldnt be completely shocked.
I wish my life was like a movie.
I"m obsessed with the idea of the perfect guy... or my prince charming
and i like to learn from my past.. look forward to my future.. while living in the present.
i believe in living life with no regrets.. however..
i have an epic plan i need to take up with the BIG GUY.. i think we need to develop a 'punch card' system for life..
a punch card for do-overs. a punch card for mistakes you would never admit to. a punch card for doughnuts you could eat without them showin up in your backside. a punch card for lies. a punch card for heartbreak.
and once the punch card is filled.. you put it behind you and move on.
As i look through my past... searching for moments 'do-over punch card' worthy... i imagine what i reallllly would've done differently if i could do something again..

I know all of the trials and decisions i've gone through have made me what i am today.. but was there an easier path with the same destination? did i really HAVE to cry every single one of those tears to build the heart muscle i have?
Because my mind is completely demented.. have i made life way harder than it should be in general..?

I look at times in my life where i fell into patterns of unrighteous routines. no - i'm not talking about sinning. this isn't a confession hotline.
I"m talking about times i allowed myself be less than what i was capable of being.
unfortunately.. this has happened a lot.

If each one of us takes the raw talent and potential we were given at BIRTH... and honestly evaluate what we've made of it.. i can only HOPE you're better than i am.. and that you can look yourself in the eye and say 'i'm truly the best person i can be in every area of my life'.
How many of us slack off because something comes easy? Because something is comfortable? or because we don't know how or why we would ever need it in the future..?

Mediocrity scares me. Its scares me to DEATH!..
i know without a doubt that.. good or bad (most likely bad).. there is no one in the world like me. Each one of us is like a snowflake.. if there were 2 of us... something went wrong. I know that no one in the world is capable of what im capable of. No one would do something and succeed the exact same way i would. Nobody could bring the world what i could bring it.. it comes with our individuality. Someone else could do something better.. worse... or differently than i would.. but not in the same MC-style.
I realize how much i have to offer the world... yet i have still let myself walk instead of sprint.. not lift as much weight as my muscles could take.. and mosey on through my chapters of my fairy tale that i'm in charge of writing.

My biggest fear in life.. has become my reality.
I look to my future.. and ALL i want to be is extraordinary. All i want to be is the best me i could ever even POSSIBLY be! In every area! Yet.. along my path.. i've slowed my progress.. i've slacked off.. and i've let things get in the way of my McCallness that shouldn't have.

I believe that it's not what happens to us.. but what we DO with what happens to us that determines the way we live our lives.
It's like i said... i think i've just made life way harder than it really is! I've created the image of greatness in my mind.. placed it in front of me.. and then backed away from it.

We live in a world full of expectations.
Some people believe that high expectations are in the formula of failure and discouragement..
that with low expectations you will always be happy.
These people... are retarded.
I believe in a world of HIGH expectations and the constant battle and strive to meet them! This is my definition of success! To push ourselves forward in everything.. bettering ourselves inch by inch.. day by day.. moment by moment.
I've talked before about managing expectations and how you have to set yourself up for success.. you have to make sure you set realistic expectations to alter your reality around.. but you are the author of your success.. you are the person who sets your bar.. if you set it low.. you'll never reach.. because you'll never have to.

In relationships.. i believe if an issue is there.. TACKLE IT! don't let it pass by in fear of contention.. don't ignore it because it would be easier that way! take it by the tushy and kick it's butt! beat it til it's resolved!

My friend Whitney just got into a relationship with her boyfriend Rick.
They've known each other for a LONG time.. and they've been friends forever! Watching them through out the years.. has been like watching Lizzie and Gordo on Lizzie Mcguire.. you KNOW they're meant to be together! We've all taken bets to when this day would come!
They dated in high school for a while.. and then broke up after a year because they didn't want to mess with their friendship.. and they wanted to make sure they dated other people before they sealed the deal in the future.
This time when they finally got together (like 6 months ago) all of us placed our bet for their wedding day.. put some money in the pot.. and waited.
and waited.... and waited.......and waited..........................
It's been 6 months.. and they're not engaged. WE'RE SHOCKED!
Lizzie + Gordo = Love. = marriage. = happily ever after!! Whitney + Rick.. SHOULD = no brainer!
But talking to whitney through this relationship.. i've found that things are way harder and more complicated than either one of them had ever anticipated! They were just as shocked as we were that they weren't flying free full speed ahead without hesitation!
Although they both had dated other people since their traumatic break up in high school... they both only had one other serious relationship in their lives.
They were in these relationships in a later part of their lives.. therefore.. they were more 'grown up relationships' than the one they had had with each other all those years ago.
The people they dated opened their eyes to completely different spectrums of emotions.. because they were almost exact opposites to rick and whitney.
Rick had had a relationship with the Anti-whitney.
Whitney had had a relationship with the Anti-rick.
and now they're both so confused about what they want that they can't see the magic that everyone else can.
Whitney's ex boyfriend Winston.. has become the standard. He is what she knows and what she was last comfortable with as far as a relationship goes.. He was crazy.. out there.. took control.. took center stage.. and dragged her out to the middle with him. He did his thing.. she did hers.. and together they made this unstoppable train.
Rick.. is more reserved.. his relationship with whitney was a more private one.. they liked to spend more time alone and with their families rather than friends.. Whitney took center stage.. OR rick took center stage.. it was a trade off relationship.. as opposed to a duet centered one. They rode solo.. and took each other's back seats.
Britney.. rick's ex.. was the fan club. She was always backstage cheering rick on.. but never EVER would step into the spotlight with him. she RAN the spotlight.. making sure it was on him at all times! She became the standard for him. It was no longer a Whitney centered world.. there were other factors.. other options ..in the picture now.

With the changes and the growing that both Whit and Rick have gone through... the rest of the world sits back and we think.. daaaang they're more perfect for each other NOW than they ever were before! just IMAGINE how happy they're going to be now! they were made for each other!
But whitney is confused. so is rick. and they don't know what to do.

Mclove Dr. to the rescue.
As much as you two THINK you know each other already... from what you've told me.. all you've wanted each other to be.. is something that you're not.
You've attempted to recreate the relationships you were last in.. only with each other.
Whitney.. you are never going to BE britney.. and if rick wants that.. screw him.
I don't think he really does. He just has to reset his standard.. and figure out what about YOU that he loves.. instead of what about you is like britney that he loves.

Rick.. you could never and will never be Winston. You should accept this confidently. But you need to know that because whitney is now used to sharing the spotlight.. as opposed to sitting in the audience half the time.. that its gonna take some adjustment!

Learn to love a NEW relationship.. not hold on to an old one! you're different people! recreate the magic that all of us see in you guys!! you're not far from it already!

Set the standard of success in your relationship.. and then don't back away from it! embrace it! tackle it!!
SET high expectations.. and then meet them together!! your relationship will be stronger.. better.. and what you want.. because of it!
Don't be afraid to adjust! It's part of the process of 'becoming'.
Don't settle for the mediocrity that you're in right now.
You're making this way harder than it should be.

Each one of us is born to succeed.
In our passions.. relationships.. education.. physically.. emotionally.. spiritually.. mentally...
We are the only thing holding ourselves back. We're given the tools. We need to rise to the occasion.

My friend Jordan has always been a star athlete. In highschool.. he was an all-state soccer player.. he was fast.. athletic (obviously).. he was team captain his Jr. and Sr. year.. and he had the world at his finger tips.
Soccer had always come naturally to him... easy to him.. and he had always been the best. He never had to stretch past the point of discomfort to be ahead of the pack.
Other's looked up to him.. and he wore the mantle of leadership well. he enjoyed it. He enjoyed motivating others through his remarkable talent.
When transitioning into college soccer after a 2 year mission for his church.. his world was ROCKED.
Soccer was everything. and now soccer was HARD!
in college.. they did it differently.
in college.. he wasn't known as the best.. he left his reputation in high school and had to form a new one based on hard work and respect.
His talent was easily met with others on the team. the ONLY thing that would set him apart was his work ethic..
but he came to me and vented that he didn't know if he could do it.
he didn't know if he could spend the time and effort to work his way back up from the bottom to rise to the top in this new empire of college sports. Sure he loved soccer... but he didn't love sitting the bench in soccer taking notes.. he liked the action.. the sweat.. the WORK.. and the glory!
Jordan... my advice..
stick to it! for the first time in your life something you love is hard for you! soccer has never been hard! you have the opportunity to stretch PAST the point of discomfort.. to not sit back and let your life run it's course but to take life by the tush and fight for something!
You're finally in CONTROL of your situation! of your future!!
Don't quit because it's hard! THRIVE because it's hard! Love the difficultly.. LOVE the new challenge that it brings!! i believe in you! you need to believe in yourself!
Don't be prideful.. don't think you're above being the underdog.. and you will be better than you ever even imagined you could be!
Set the standard.. and meet it!
Place success in front of you.. and sprint your guts out to it!! don't you dare run away from it!
you can do it.

We live in a world of glass... we're so afraid of setting it off balance.. cuz it might break! we feel like everyone is looking in on us.. waiting for us to mess up.. and it paralyzes us. We're afraid of setting expectations because then people will expect us to meet them!
Glass that is left still..and let be.. will always be glass... dirty.. dusty.. ordinary.. glass..
but glass that's put through refiners fires.. time and time again.. that's paid attention to.. and perfected daily.. is made into something beautiful... something artistic.. something much more than something to look through.. its made something to look AT.

You write the recipe for your own success.. you measure it.. you make it.. and then you get to enjoy it!
Don't let yourself settle at mediocrity. STRIVE for excellence. THRIVE on the extraordinary. and push yourself past the point of discomfort to achieve it!
Don't let yourself go one DAY without being happy. You deserve so much more than that!
Go be your own miracle. Be your own self-help book.
and if you need a pick me up.. you know where to find me.

xoxo
McSwagger.