Join a 'married' class. this one is for single people ONLY. duh!
and yes, the second time you asked me for a pen... you were flirting with me... im not the only one that has taken sneaking the words 'my wife' in there as a joke!
love,
Wear a ring.
Dear Boyfriend 85 miles away,
Our relationship is getting expensive.. and i will NOT ride tracks.. the bus.. or any other public transportation method that i've seen someone in a movie get raped on.
Love,
I'm dating via skype.
Dear Professor Anal much,
You lost me the second you said 'this wont be on the final but..'
im not learning anthro for kicks and giggles..
Love,
going back to sleep
Dear Ho trying to steal my future husband,
Apparently you haven't seen the notebook... let me clue you in... i win.
love,
its cute that you're trying.
Dear creeper at the library,
yes i'm watching you stalk me on facebook as we speak. i'm scared for my life.
love,
give a glance around before choosing a target.
Dear awkward couple walking with their arms around each other,
i dont care how much you love each other.. that just looks uncomfortable. stop it. hold hands like normal people.
love,
you're making winning 'awkward couple bingo' waaay too easy for me.
Dear Provo All Star on campus,
When answering the question 'what are you studying'.. don't admit that you've graduated.. it makes you look like a sex offender.
love,
what the heck are you doing here then
Dear lady with a swan on her head,
as much as i love Kate Middleton... the hat thing.. doesnt work for you.
love,
it looks like something died on your hair
Dear Cute Boy next door,
We both know you're falling in love with me. Just go with it.
the money we would save on gas alone is enough to make you my BF.
love,
you cant buy that kind of convenience
Dear testing center homie,
i dont care that i have dark hair in my student ID. For $80 you could too.
love,
identity theft to take a written final is highly unlikely
Dear walk-of-shame-girl,
next time you sleep at your bf's house.. take sweats... and flip-flops.
nobody wears those lady gaga shoes to get the mail..
love,
you're not fooling anyone
Dear Confused Chick,
Just because you put Ugg boots with booty shorts doesn't mean you are dressed for winter.
love,
Pick a season.. you look like a moron
Dear Boy texting,
read before sending. You sound like you dont speak english.
love,
the grammar police
Enjoy Finals!
xoxo
-Callymon
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